Dr. Bessel van der Kolk’s groundbreaking work shows that trauma affects both the mind and body, and that healing requires reconnecting with both. At Calmura Counseling & Wellness, we draw on his insights to offer trauma information therapy and PTSD treatment in Los Angeles County, helping clients find safety, balance, and lasting recovery.

Across generations, men have been taught that strength means silence. That to cry, to reach out, or to admit pain is to betray masculinity. Yet beneath this silence lies a growing crisis. Men are dying by suicide at alarming rates, battling depression, addiction, and loneliness often in isolation. For Black men, these struggles are intensified by cultural and historical barriers that make vulnerability feel dangerous, even disloyal.

The Undoing of Silence explores how this legacy of stoicism and shame continues to wound men, and how therapy can become an act of defiance, healing, and love. Through the lens of attachment theory, cultural analysis, and lived experience, this piece invites a reimagining of strength: one rooted not in endurance, but in connection.

To heal, men must be given permission. Permission to speak, to feel, and to be held in compassion. To listen is to participate in their liberation.

In the article we will inform you on the difference between styles, and also provide guidance on how we can move towards a more secure style.